Hi all. Sebastian here. I thought I would tell you about the part-time job I am applying for. This ad in the classified section of the newspaper caught my eye.
It didn’t take me but a second to realize that it was the perfect job for me. I am very good at paw/palm reading, but I thought I should brush up a little before I went for the interview.
The only humans around here that I could practice on are you-know-who and you-know-him. Even though I had to pull her away from cutting out a new bear friend, she agreed and asked me if I could also paint her nails while I was at it. I had to tell her that wasn’t part of the job description. Paint her nails! Humph!
Here I am taking a close look at all the lines. First there’s the heart line. “Uh-huh. I see” I said. “What does that mean?” she asked. “Sh-h-h” I replied, “I’m in the middle here.”
Next, I read her life line. “Yes, m-m-m-m.” I muttered. “Sebastian, what are you seeing?” she demanded. I guess I had to tell her. This is what I saw. She had a somewhat questionable life line. I said her life would be very short unless she kept a big stash of cookies in the cupboard. I also could see she had a very big heart which meant she was very content to have cookies and milk for dinner.
I couldn’t really tell if she was pleased with the reading. She walked away mumbling something about 5 minutes of her life gone or some such thing. I don’t know where she got that from. I wasn’t really specific about how much time she had left.
“Next!” I called out and in came You-know-him. “Ah-ha! Very in-ter-rest-ing.”
I could tell that he had a very long life ahead of him if he shared his evening snacks with a very cute little bear that resides in his house.
Then something startled me a bit. I took a close look. “Oh, the horror!” I exclaimed.
Of course I had alarmed him. I had to explain myself immediately. “I see you have been in the kitchen and come back empty handed! And yet, I smell . . . I smell . . . chocolate! This you must fix at once or a dire future is in store for your love life. Go! Go! At once and repair yourself to the kitchen and return with chocolate!” He walked away saying something about ‘definitely, your bear’ whatever that means.
As for the fortune teller part of the job, I need a few more subjects to practice on. Maybe you can help. If you have a question about your future, you could leave it in a comment for me and I will do my best to tell your fortune. I’ll be here all weekend and I am happy to impart my wisdom.